Review: "Nacho Libre"

by Jeff McGinnis, Lead Usher

* star (out of four)
91 minutes, Now Showing

The Mexican tradition of Lucha Libre has a long and storied history in the culture. A more free-flowing and high-flying based style of wrestling compared to its American counterpart (it literally translates as "Free Fight"), Lucha Libre is a tradition with deeply rooted respect in the country. The stars of the sport become so much more to their fans than just simple wrestlers, they are national heroes and icons. When the most famous luchador of all time, El Santo, passed away, he was buried in his mask, so that the legend of the character would never be disturbed.

I pass along this information to establish my knowledge of and experience with the honorable art form, and not to bolster the film “Nacho Libre,” which is a piece of cr*p. I honestly don’t know how many more ways this could have gone wrong. I mean, come on! It’s Jack Black as a Mexican wrestler! The jokes are right there! How could this NOT be funny? Oh, very easily, apparently. I mean, you look at the list of talent connected with the film and you just shake your head at how all of it has been wasted. Jack Black! He’s a very funny actor! Mike White! He’s a very funny writer! Jared Hess! He’s…a director!

Okay, okay, maybe I’m being too hard on Hess. I must admit, for the sake of complete disclosure, that I have never seen his previous film, the much-beloved “Napoleon Dynamite.” For all the positive notices that movie got, I got two wretched reports from two of my most respected opinions on film (for the record, their names are Ebert and McGinnis), so I never really felt a pressing need to watch it. Now I feel like I have to. Because if this film is any representation of what Hess feels is “comic timing,” the success of “Napoleon” has now become a deeper mystery than the solution of the cryptex in “The Da Vinci Code.”

The film stars Black as a monk named Ignacio who has secretly dreamed of being a luchador ever since he was a boy. He is stuck making mediocre meals for an orphanage. One day, he sees a notice for new wrestlers and decides to sign up, recruiting a guy on the street who stole a bag of nacho chips from him (named Esqualeto, played by Hector Jimenez). Ignacio dubs himself “Nacho,” and the fearsome tag team proceeds to lose every match they are involved in. Meantime, Nacho lusts after the beautiful Sister Encarnacion (Ana de la Reguera), and dreams of learning from the great Ramses (Cesar Gonzalez, better known to wrestling and lucha fans as “Silver King”).

If I have made ANY of this sound even remotely interesting and/or funny, my apologies, for I have failed you, dear reader. There aren’t any laughs in the movie. Hell, there isn’t even A laugh, singular. None of the jokes work. Wait, that’s not accurate, because that implies that there are jokes in the first place. The film sets up what seems to be a comic situation, seems to head for a punch line, then stops before it gets there. Even the gags which were funny in the trailer flop horribly here. The timing is all off.

Jack Black, normally one of our funniest performers, doesn’t help matters. His performance seems to be at right angles with the movie. When a gag would be best served by underplaying, Black mugs shamelessly. When over the top physicality is required, he seems quiet. What happened here? Were Black’s typically keen performer’s instincts really this inaccurate, or did Hess just use takes which were horribly inappropriate? Seeing as how I’ve seen Black prevail in tougher comic environs, I’m inclined to blame Hess, but then I’m inclined to blame Hess for just about everything right now, save for the audience actually having to pay money to see this.

The wrestling scenes are particularly inept. Not only are there no laughs, but even as a simulation of a wrestling spectacle, it fails miserably. One thinks emulating the gist of a wrestling match would be hard to screw up, given how few specifics there are to miss - the rules are virtually non-existent, and the match ends with a pinfall. But by gum, never tell this director that he can’t miss something! Every match is just a half-hearted exhibition of maneuvers that maybe could be mistaken for wrestling moves, and then they just…end. No pinfall or submission or anything. Hmm. A lot of set up with no discernible purpose or climax. Hey, the matches are just like the jokes! It’s a theme!

Look, if you want to have a few laughs with the world of wrestling, just watch a wrestling match. A great deal of the art form is just broad comedy, anyway. I’ve laughed louder and more frequently in a wrestling arena than any audience will at this movie, I guarantee. So save yourself the price of admission and just watch TNA Impact some Thursday. Or Univision airs Lucha Libre on Saturdays, try that. As for this movie, I only hope that Jack Black and Mike White (heh, Black and White, now THAT’s funny) move on to better things, and quickly. As for Hess, well, I’m afraid the jury’s still out on that one.