"Evan Almighty" Review

by Jeff McGinnis, Lead Usher

** stars (out of four)
90 minutes, starts Friday, June 22nd


Watching "Evan Almighty" is like having a staring contest with a billionaire. He's offered you a million dollars if you can outlast him. You focus, focus, focus, channel all your energy into keeping...your...eyes...open...you will yourself to keep going, knowing that a great reward awaits you if you can just...make...it. You win, you get the million, but boy, was it agony to get there. Same basic concept here. This is a film that crafts a likable character, proceeds to spend an hour and a half putting him through the cinematic equivalent of a living hell (no pun intended), and then rewards the audience with a fairly good ending. But boy, it is agony to get there.

The first film in the series, "Bruce Almighty," was wonderful, a sweet and genuine comedy with a lot of heart. That film starred Jim Carrey as the title character, who met God (Morgan Freeman, in one of the best pieces of casting ever) and was granted all his powers. Along the way, he learned the value of humility and love. That film had a truly lovely ending, and the action which preceded it was funny and entertaining.

Wisely, "Evan"'s filmmakers (director Tom Shadyac, who also directed the first film, and writer Steve Oedekirk) have decided to avoid simply repeating the first film's plot and take a whole new direction with the franchise, including a new leading man, Steve Carell, who had a small role in the first "Evan" as a rival newscaster who Bruce tormented. The change in lead character may not have necessarily been their CHOICE, but no matter, as Carell is a splendid comic actor who is just hitting his stride as a big name in Hollywood, following the tremendously successful "40-Year-Old Virgin" and "Little Miss Sunshine."

Unlike the brash and unlikable Evan the first film brought us, Leading Man Evan has been transformed into a good family man with a loving wife (Lauren Graham) and kids, and a brand-spanking new job: He's been elected to Congress from the state of New York. How his opponent wouldn't have won in a landslide after tape of the "fit" Bruce gave him on live TV would have hit YouTube is anyone's guess. Evan's views and political affiliation naturally remain a mystery, as no one in any Hollywood film outside of Michael Moore is allowed to outright express support for one political party over another.

Anyway, upon arriving at his new home and preparing to start his new job, Evan takes a moment to pray and ask for God's help in "changing the world," saying "I know that with great power comes great responsibility" without even a trace of irony. Soon after, he starts to receive packages from "Alpha-Omega Hardware" (nyuk nyuk) that contain rudimentary building tools and lumber - LOTS of lumber. Soon after, God (Freeman again) appears to Evan and instructs him to build an ark, just like Noah did. He even provides a handy book: Ark Building for Dummies.

This is not exactly what Evan wants to hear right now, given his new responsibilities. He's got nice digs in the capital, a great support staff (including John Michael Higgins, Jonah Hill and the indispensable Wanda Sykes), and the budding respect of veteran Congressman Long (John Goodman). So God presses the issue by, say, having animals follow Evan everywhere he goes, or making his hair and beard grow at an astonishing rate, or forcing him to appear in public in a robe that looks like it was pilfered from the set of "The Last Temptation of Christ." And so then Evan has to explain himself. Over and over and over again.

This entire section of the movie is like that. Some weird situation is forced upon Evan, and Evan has to bluff his way out, usually unconvincingly. We in the audience could come up with better excuses than the writers conjure up for him. Found in his office with a few hundred birds all over him, Evan just sits there and acts like he hired trained animals to make a political point. Not particularly funny, and certainly not convincing, even less so when Long and his fellow congressmen actually BUY it.

Why is God making it so damn hard for Evan? I know the whole "works in mysterious ways" thing (especially in the old testament, where, for example, God unleashes 10 plagues when just slapping the pharaoh around would have worked fine), but the mysterious ways of this film strain credulity to the breaking point. God seems to delight in putting Evan in a never-ending set of embarrassing situations, making his presence known or not known just enough so only Evan knows he's there, and thus leaving Evan eternally having to explain himself. This is God-as-Allen-Funt. Given all the calamity that Evan faces en route to getting the ark built, God's efforts seem less like setting a path and more like erecting an obstacle course.

The bigger problem, though, is that there aren't really that many laughs in the film. A lot of the jokes fall flat, and few of the characters emerge as genuinely memorable - more like pawns in a narrative game. Carell is a great comedian and makes an excellent leading man, but he really isn't given that much funny to do. He bleats, blusters and makes excuses, but he's never particularly comical, which is genuinely odd. Lauren Graham does what she can with the role of Joan, Evan's wife, but she's left switching from supportive to critical at the whims of the screenplay. Evan's three sons are given only the most rudimentary of character traits and never emerge as individuals. Goodman's congressman is a typical villain, and in fact the entire Washington setting proves completely superfluous. Evan could have become a executive at a banking company and it probably would have accomplished the same thing.

As stated, the ending is quite good and ties stuff up nicely, and, as anyone who's seen any of the previews can tell you, the film does indeed end with a flood, which is very well done. Even then, God-as-prankster kicks in, as it starts to rain, then stops, letting those who were shouting insults at Evan and his crew get in a few more choice comments before the flooding begins in earnest. And so soon after the tragedy of Hurricane Katrina, I'm not sure how wise it is to depict massive flooding in a residential area, particularly in a silly mainstream comedy.

There's good stuff in "Evan Almighty," if you can get to it. If you fancy yourself a strong-willed moviegoer who can tough it out through a stretch of odd and relatively unfunny filmmaking, you'll get a fairly nice treat at the end. Me, I just can't help but think it's all unnecessary, and makes God out to be a first-class pain in the butt. If you do see the film, you might end us asking yourself a question, as I did: Given the ultimate cause of the flood in question, wouldn't God have been better served to avoid the whole dog-and-pony (and-bird-and-alligator-and-giraffe-and-hippo-and-EVERYTHING) show and just sent a signal to a public works contractor that they had some rebuilding to do?

"Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer" Review

by Jeff McGinnis, Lead Usher

* star (out of four)
90 minutes, starts Friday, June 15th


(WARNING: The following review is basically one, big spoiler. If you intend to see this film, and nothing I can say will change your mind, I highly advise that you stop reading now, as I basically plan to give away the entire plot of the movie. If, however, you do not plan to see this film and/or would like to hear a compelling, articulate and, dare I say, extremely humorous take on why you should not, please read on. Batten down the hatches, folks, we got "Aeon Flux" coming here.)

It is human to make mistakes. Admitting them and doing your best to atone for them is what helps us to rise above our frailties and become a better person. As a critic, then, I must admit that I enjoyed the first "Fantastic Four" movie the first time I saw it. Yes, I said it, and I'm not ashamed of it. I'm not sure what came over me. At the time, I guess it seemed like a nice dose of dumb summer fun, and on that level I liked it. I would ascribe this reaction to something in my popcorn except I didn't have any.

Further viewings, alas, made plain my mistake for the dreadful error in judgment that it was. Shallow as the kiddie end of the pool, with characters as thin as a strand of cotton candy, the first "Fantastic Four" movie simply cannot hold weight when compared with other examples of its genre: "Spider-Man." "X-Men." "Batman Begins." "Superman." There is more sophistication and story in any installment of "Batman: The Animated Series" than the original "Fantastic Four" film could ever hope to attain, with the possible exception of the "Critters" episode of "Batman."

But I confess to holding out hope for the sequel, subtitled "Rise of the Silver Surfer." That first trailer looked REALLY cool. Comprised entirely of a chase scene between the Surfer (Doug Jones) and the Human Torch (Chris Evans), it had a sense of awe and wonder that was entirely lacking from the first film. Perhaps, even though the same director and writer and cast were being reunited for this sequel, they found some of the magic they were missing the first time around and had crafted something better, something deeper, something grand.

Then, in the same scene in the movie, the Torch catches up to the Surfer and says, "Can we talk?" And the hope gets flushed down the toilet. Trust me folks, all the grand possibilities in the world mean nothing when confronted by the overwhelming power of the cr*ppy dialogue in this movie. Not to mention the plot. And characters. And...but, wait, let us take this in order, shall we?

The film begins with a shot of a planet being destroyed, followed by credits that fly toward us in space, and if we had tried any harder to make it plain that we were ripping off the Superman title sequence, we'd have actually included the "S" logo. A silver streak flies from the destruction towards Earth, bringing about odd climate changes and water that freezes in place and electricity going out. A news anchor makes it abundantly clear that this is NOT the result of global warming, and since she is a Fox News broadcaster, you can practically hear the glee in her voice.

But, of course, the BIG story they report is the impending wedding of Reed Richards (Ioan Gruffudd) and Sue Storm (Jessica Alba), as the nuptials of the heroes have become a world-class media circus. Even though weird events are paralyzing and threatening people all over the globe, Reed makes it clear to Sue that the wedding is the most important thing to him. Reed: "I'm not letting anything get in the way of that, not even the mysterious transformation of matter at the sub-atomic level." Gets you right there, don't it?

Then some military guys show up at the Four's headquarters, accompanied by suitable rum-tummy-tum music, led by General Hager (Andre Braugher), who will certainly go down as one of the least competent military characters ever in motion picture history. He wants the Four to figure out just what the heck is going on with this silver flash, but first they have to fetch Reed from a bachelor party thrown by Johnny and the Thing (Michael Chiklis), in a scene which demonstrates two things: One, that apparently Mr. Fantastic's civilian clothing is as elastic as he is (in which case I wanna meet his tailor), and two, that among Sue's superpowers is the ability to switch between jealous and understanding at lightning speed.

Anyway, Reed is asked to build some kind of tracking device to follow the mysterious figure all over the globe, where, for no apparent reason, it is leaving these huge craters which tunnel down a really long way. Reed says no, because he's getting married, and by gum, his wedding is more important than the world ending. General Hager: (scornfully) "I expected more from you, Richards." Well, I expected more from you, too, Andre, and it looks like we're both gonna be disappointed.

But, oh, never mind, Reed builds the tracking device anyway, without Sue's permission, somehow keeping the giant metal gizmo in plain view in his lab without letting Sue know that he's building it. Wedding day arrives (with suitable jitters from the bride and groom, and a nice cameo by Stan Lee included), but it gets ruined when the Surfer shows up and Johnny has to chase after...but, you've seen the trailer, so you know this. After saving all the wedding guests, Sue slumps down on the stairs in despair, because never mind that a mysterious force is somehow ripping apart the fabric of our civilization and threatening life on Earth as we know it, SHE WANTED TO GET MARRIED, DAMMIT.

Anyway, Johnny survives his encounter with the Surfer, and it turns out that somehow this has left him with the ability to swap powers with his teammates. This leads to a series of "fun" scenes where the characters suddenly find themselves doing each other's shtick, but this is about as significant as if the Ninja Turtles swapped weapons. Meantime, the evil Dr. Doom (Julian McMahon) somehow gets freed by the Surfer's power, and, wearing a hood and looking remarkably like the Emperor from "Star Wars," he goes to meet the Surfer by heading for one of the craters. Okay, so, no one else thought of that? Doom's been on the case five minutes and he knows right where to go. Meantime, the Four are busy building tracking devices and swapping powers. Point for Doom.

Meantime, Reed does some research by punching a few buttons on a computer and determines that every planet the Surfer has ever gone to has been destroyed within eight days (um, is that Earth days or Other-Planet days?). He shows the destruction of each using an extremely high-powered telescope that can give amazingly detailed views of the planets in question, as well as, apparently, the ability to see back in time when the destruction happened. Yeah, f*ck you, Hubble, you been FACED by a gizmo the Fantastic Four apparently have just lying around their workshop. This telescope can also determine that all the life on these other planets was destroyed, as well. So, not only does Reed have a time-traveling super telescope, but he's proven that there is life on other planets. Shouldn't he have, like, 40 Nobel Prizes by this point?

But the military, unimpressed by their amazing gizmos and superpowers, can only see failure in how the Four have handled the situation, so they do the logical thing: Recruit Dr. Doom. Yes, the super villain who tried to destroy the Four and half of New York in the last film, and who by this point has magically stopped needing an elaborate makeup job. Doom and the Four agree to work together to stop the threat. Johnny: "Think Reed's right about this end-of-the-world stuff?" Thing: "He's never been wrong about this kind of thing before."

So we decide that the Surfer's board is the source of all his power, and if you separate him from the board, he is then, uh, powerless. They prove this by using some other gizmo they invent (which General Hager scoffs at when he's told it will take three hours to complete) to dislodge the Surfer from the board, but not until after the Surfer dodges a whole missile array, and not until after he's had a heart-to-heart with Sue, who suddenly finds him sympathetic. Well, can you blame her? The Surfer speaks in the voice of Lawrence Fishburne. How can anyone who sounds like Lawrence Fishburne be evil, I ask you? Well, okay, Ike Turner.

Anyway, the military captures the Surfer, and come to the only logical conclusion one can come to when you've captured an other-worldly creature that has amazing powers and knowledge of the cosmos at his command: TORTURE HIM MERCILESSLY. Well, this is a Fox film, maybe Jack Bauer is rubbing off on the rest of the company. Sue sneaks in to hear some more of that sweet, sweet Fishburne voice, and is told that the Surfer is merely the harbinger - the REAL planet-destroying bad-*ss, Galactus, is on his way. The Surfer just does his bidding because he doesn't want his own planet to get destroyed, too. Why a planet-eating entity needs a guy on a surfboard to wreak havoc ahead of him is left unexplained. I guess those huge craters make the planet more devour-able, or easier to grab, like bowling ball holes.

Meantime, even though Doom really didn't DO anything, per se, General Hager keeps his end of the bargain by allowing Doom to test the Surfer's board. Yes, we're LETTING THE SUPERVILLAIN IN THE SAME ROOM WITH THE SINGLE MOST POWERFUL WEAPON IN THE UNIVERSE. In the grand annals of dumb ideas, this has to rank in the top five or so. And, hey, go figure, within a minute Doom has taken control of the board and killed Hager. The Four spring the Surfer and chase after Doom in the new Fantasticar, which, for no explicable reason outside of product placement dollars, has a Dodge logo on the front. Johnny: "Hemi?" Reed: "Of course." Me: (incredulous laughter)

The final battle takes the heroes to a street in Japan, which looks uncannily like a studio backlot, where Sue gets mortally wounded when she tries to save the Surfer, and then Johnny somehow takes the powers of ALL FOUR members of the group at once to stop Doom. How we got from "Power Swapping" to "I Can Hold All of Your Powers at Once" is a mystery that's best left unsolved, methinks. The Four successfully get the Surfer back on his board, and after magically healing Sue (Post-Resurrection Dialogue - Sue: "Hi." Reed: "Hi." Sue: "What'd I miss?"), the Surfer, who has learned the value of life or something, heads off to stop Galactus, who looks uncannily in form and action like a giant anus made out of clouds. The Surfer blows himself up to kill Galactus and end the threat to both Earth and his own world. Apparently it had never occurred to the Surfer that if he'd done that, say, 10 planets ago, it would have accomplished the same thing.

Reed and Sue then successfully complete their marriage and head off to save Venice from sinking into the sea, but not before stopping to make the "4" logo in the clouds with their wicked cool Fantasticar, which I actually think got destroyed during the final battle just a scene ago, but we're just picking nits now, aren't we?

A quick glance at the movie listings reveal that the following films are still playing in theatres this weekend: "Spider-Man 3." "Waitress." "Ocean's 13." "Knocked Up." "28 Weeks Later." Heck, some are still showing "Bridge to Terabithia" and "300," if you missed those. There are plenty of good films to see. You have a lot of options. If, however, after reading this far and digesting all my best efforts to dissuade you from doing so, you still feel the need to see "Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer," that is, of course, entirely your choice. Leaves more good movies for the rest of us.

"Waitress" Review

by Jeff McGinnis, Lead Usher

***1/2 stars (out of four)
104 minutes, Now Showing


What a wonderfully odd and unique movie to be talking about. "Waitress" is a comedy which prides itself on never quite going where you think it is, one which would love to introduce you to some characters you've never met before. In today's filmgoing climate, that is certainly a most welcome change.

This is a movie about love and hate, joy and sorrow, hope and hopelessness, rebellion and acceptance, and learning to be strong by being selfless. If I made no sense in that previous sentence, trust me, you'll understand once you see the film. The film runs the gambit in terms of its theme - in turn, it is about being in love, being married to someone you don't love, being pregnant, being a friend, being trapped, and more. It is all unified by director Adrienne Shelley with an infectiously joyous tone which underscores every scene, and a wonderful performance by Keri Russell, who, if she wasn't quite a big star before this movie came out, will certainly be now that it has.

As the film opens, we meet Jenna (Russell), a waitress at a small town pie shop named Joe's Diner. She is a master at pie-making, inventing a new kind every day as the house special, and pours her emotions into every pie she invents. Right after the movie begins, she learns she is pregnant and immediately fashions a "I Don't Want Earl's Baby" pie.

Earl (Jeremy Sisto) is Jenna's husband, and if you had him for a spouse, you might make a pie with such a sentiment, too. Earl is a mean and selfish man who is exceedingly controlling of Jenna, who he wants to stay right where she is so that she can never leave him. She dreams of heading off to a big national pie-making contest and making her fortune, but he flips out and drags her home as she tries to leave. Earl's demeanor and character ride the line of being over-the-top, but the world certainly has its fair share of Earls out there, and there is tremendous satisfaction in how his storyline is finally resolved.

Upon learning of her pregnancy, Jenna goes to her longtime doctor, only to find out that she has semi-retired and is being replaced by Dr. Pomatter (Nathan Fillion), a handsome young man who quickly takes an interest in Jenna. The two of them fall into an affair practically without realizing it, even though they're both married. "Maybe we could have a coffee or something,” he says. She directly replies that coffee is on the list of bad foods he gave her when she got pregnant. "What kind of doctor are you?"

The film is peopled with unique and interesting characters in every corner of the frame. Jenna's best friends at the diner are fellow waitresses Becky (Cheryl Hines), who is constantly grousing that her breasts are crooked, and Dawn (Shelley herself), a mousy but loveable woman who is always on the lookout for love. Cook and manager Cal (Lew Temple) seems to be of a disagreeable disposition, but he has a few surprises in store. Diner owner and mainstay Old Joe (Andy Griffith) seems like a picky and crotchety old coot, but he comes with the obligatory level of homespun wisdom, delivered by Griffith in a way that always feels genuine.

Russell was a fairly unknown performer to me prior to this film. I had never seen her popular show “Felicity,” and her previous movies (including “Mission: Impossible III”) had missed my radar, as well. Here she crafts a screen character that is unique and engaging, completely sympathetic and ultimately lovable. She is the rock on which the whole film stands, as she appears in every scene, and at the end, when her character takes a surprising and sudden turn, we completely understand the thought process that leads her to do it. Before our eyes, we can see her character grow up.

The film also boasts a highly energetic and whimsical visual style. The frame comes saturated with bright, primary colors that practically jump off the screen, depicting an idealized small-town world which Jenna’s drama plays itself out in front of. Dialogue crackles with fast-paced wit and genuinely big laughs while never violating tone or character. Shelley has crafted a world that it is impossible to not smile while you are watching.

Ultimately, “Waitress” is a film about coming to terms with responsibility, and how surprisingly easy it can be to initiate change in your own life, if you want to bad enough. There comes a moment of revelation for Jenna that hits with startling focus (both emotional and literal, in film terms) where suddenly life seems much clearer than it ever has, and what she has to do and hasn’t been able to become remarkably easy. It is odd how, sometimes in life, the easiest decisions are the hardest ones to reach. Another summer film, “Knocked Up,” deals with similar issues and themes (and both use a pregnancy as their central storytelling conceit), but as good as “Knocked Up” is, “Waitress” goes deeper and is even funnier. If you have to choose, this is the one to see.


(NOTE: Tragically, director and writer Adrienne Shelley was murdered last fall in her hometown of New York. She was only 40 years old. I chose to avoid mentioning this in the body of the review, as coverage of the film seems almost dominated by it (I’ve found myself bringing it up a great deal, too), and it threatens to overwhelm discussion of the movie itself. I think if I were Shelley, I’d really want people to talk about the film, particularly when she has left us with such a tremendously touching and entertaining work. Nevertheless, it is a sad postscript that such an obviously talented filmmaker would have her life end in such a way, particularly when she was in the process of completing what certainly would have been her breakout film.)

"Ocean's 13" Review

by Jeff McGinnis, Lead Usher

*** stars (out of four)
122 minutes, Now Showing

The old saying goes, the best way to critique a movie is to make another movie. Perhaps as a corollary to that law, it could be said that the best way for a critic to criticize a film is to point to another one which does it better. As if by magic, just two weeks after "Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End" confounded me so, here comes "Ocean's 13," which is just as complicated but much more fun. It's not the complexity that is the problem, you see. But complexity without entertainment value is worthless.

I am not sure all the pieces fit in the grand scheme that Danny Ocean and his associates cook up in the third (and, if you believe George Clooney, final) installment of the "Ocean's" series, but we certainly enjoy watching them try to make them fit. This has been a franchise built and operated on the central conceit of magicians everywhere: it's not what you do, but what you let the audience see, and when you let them see it. There are surprises, secrets, twists, turns, complications and more, capped by a cast who is clearly having so much fun that we wish we had been on the set ourselves.

That feeling has infected the whole series up to this point, and this chapter is no exception. Like the Rat Pack film which inspired it, the first film, "Ocean's 11," was a sly and fun time at the movies, propelled by the sheer joy its performers exuded with every moment on screen. The second, "Ocean's 12," still had that feeling from the cast, but sadly it did not really transfer that feeling to its audience. (I enjoyed the sequel, but I appear to be the exception to the rule.)

This film seems to make a conscious effort to return the franchise to its old roots, returning the setting to Las Vegas, and once again making the villain a flat-out scoundrel for the gang to ruin. You know he's a flat-out scoundrel, because he's played by Al Pacino. No one in movie history will ever play a flat-out scoundrel with as much zest and passion as Al Pacino. Even when he's clearly not trying his hardest (like, say, here), his very bearing brings the character more interest than most actors could engender even with months of preparation under their belt.

The plot: Pacino plays Willie Bank, a developer who plans on building a new multi-million dollar casino on the strip (housed in an exceedingly implausibly designed building which looks like it's curling back onto itself). He gets the land from longtime Ocean associate Reuben Tishkoff (Elliott Gould), and then in what has to be the most blatant corporate takeover ever, basically tells Reuben he's out and makes him sign over his share. Reuben, naturally, has a heart attack and ends up catatonic in the hospital.

Cut to the remaining 11, who assemble at Reuben's bedside and plot revenge against the evil Bank, setting in motion an elaborate plan to bankrupt Bank by ruining his casino when it opens. Well, okay, calling the plan "elaborate" is understating it quite a bit. When your grand plan includes importing the drill they used to dig the Chunnel, we have gone past the "elaborate" stage, methinks. Especially when that drill breaks down and they have to get the OTHER drill they also used to dig the Chunnel.

It would not be fair to spoil any more of the ways the plan goes down, especially since the film's structure is to let the audience know what is going to happen, leave out a few select details, then watch the fun as the select details are sprung on the audience at just the right moment to ensure maximum giggles of glee. There are quite a few giggles of glee in the film, not just from the moments involving the heist, but also from the sly little moments that Clooney and Pitt share together (as when Pitt catches Clooney watching Oprah).

The new wrinkle involved in the scheme comes when longtime Ocean nemesis Terry Benedict (Andy Garcia) gets involved in the plan (they need to borrow money to buy the other drill). Benedict's motives for helping the crew this time around are a little weak (they amount to Bank's building casting an unfavorable shadow on one of his pools), but it adds a fun new dimension to the con, and we are just waiting for the moment when Ocean tries to screw Benedict, or vice versa, or both, who knows?

The only things missing this time around are Ocean's wife Tess (Julia Roberts) and Rusty's wife/girlfriend/who knows by now Isabel (Catherine Zeta-Jones), who are both dismissed with an offhand "it's not their fight" comment early in the running time. This makes the film even more of a boy's club outing than it has been in the past - the only female character who gets any appreciable screen time is Bank's second-in-command Abigail Sponder, played by Ellen Barkin, who essentially exists in the film to be flirted with by Matt Damon's Linus. Well, Ocean got the girl in the first film, Rusty the second, it only stands to reason that Linus would be the one this time around, even if at the time he's in disguise and wearing a nose that Gonzo the Great would find implausible.

In the end, watching "Ocean's 13" is like eating a Snickers bar - ultimately meaningless, but while it's happening, it tastes great. It's just an entertaining popcorn flick with actors who are clearly having a great time, particularly the great Don Cheadle as demolitions expert Basher, who gets a fun moment impersonating a daredevil that is all the more fun for being so wildly unconvincing. Director Steven Soderbergh makes films that feel like jazz, in a world where most everyone else is playing bubblegum pop. Here he puts together a catchy tune that will evaporate from the memory pretty quickly, but you're glad you were there to hear it.